Konversation Korner: Volume 4, The Gambler: EPV (Extended Play Version)

On a warm summers evenin' on a train bound for nowhere, I met up with the gambler; we were both too tired to sleep. So we took turns a starin' out the window at the darkness til boredom overtook us, and he began to speak.*

Hey! What'cha got there, Keller? asked Keeton.


"Hmmm? Oh. It's a dice. My Mommy says it's for playing games, but some people use it for gambling. Gambling is not good for you. So I eat mine, instead." said Keller.

He said, 'son, I've made a life out of readin' peoples faces, And knowin' what their cards were by the way they held their eyes. So if you don't mind my sayin, I can see you're out of aces. For a taste of your whiskey Ill give you some advice.'

"What? What are you talking about? Let me have a closer look at that thing!" said Keeton, inching closer to the strange looking object.

"Wow. It's small and square and it has dots all over it. Pretty cool! "
"Can I touch it? Here! Let me have it!" Keeton grasped for the tiny object with haste.


"Uh, no, Keeton. I found it first . . .I"m playing with it!" Keller remarked, strongly.

So I handed him my bottle and he drank down my last swallow. Then he bummed a cigarette and asked me for a light. And the night got deathly quiet, and his face lost all expression. Said, 'if youre gonna play the game, boy, ya gotta learn to play it right.'

"Yeah, but you've had it a long time. I don't want you to hurt yourself, Keller. Lemme take a closer look at this thing. . ."

"Hmmm. Uh, Keller . . .I don't think it's a good idea for you to play with this dice. You, ummm . . .might get addicted to gambling, or sumpthin' . . ." Keeton said, slyly.

You got to know when to hold em, know when to fold em, Know when to walk away and know when to run. You never count your money when youre sittin' at the table. There'll be time enough for countin when the dealin's done.

Now ev'ry gambler knows that the secret to survivin' Is knowin what to throw away and knowing what to keep. 'cause ev'ry hands a winner, and ev'ry hands a loser, And the best that you can hope for is when you lose, not to weep**.

"Nope. The best thing for me to do is to make sure you do not injure yourself on this dice. I'll put it in my mouth for safekeeping!" Keeton assuredly remarked.

"Keeton! Keeton!! Give it back! Don't go to the dark side! Don't gamble!" Keller wailed.

"PUH-lease, Keeton! Don't do it! You'll regret it!"

"Keeton! No! NO!!"

You got to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, Know when to walk away and know when to run. You never count your money when youre sittin' at the table. There'll be time enough for countin' when the dealin's done.

"Oh, Keeton. I"m so sad . . .another gamber down . . .*sigh*" bemoaned Keller.***

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*Lyrics courtesy of Kenny Rogers, The Gambler

**Lyric changed in this stanza out of courtesy and respect to Momma's who may have lost a beloved child to SID's

***No babies were harmed by dice in this photography session! ")